April 07, 2004

The Job Lottery

Don't play the lottery, it's a big swizz. I bought two tickets for the Thunderball draw tonight. I thought Thunderball was a James Bond film, but apparently not. Neither is Lotto, Euromillions, Daily Play, Lotto Hotpicks or Lotto Extra. I do think 'Daily Play' might make a good James Bond film though. When did they actually invent all these other lottery games? Surely one is enough. OK, maybe two.
As it happens, I won zip, zero, nothing, de nada, squat etc. - you get the picture, and no, I'm not bitter...
Following the recent failure of the Jobcentre Plus office in Wales to phone me when they said they would, they have re-arranged to call me next Tuesday. This is the first available slot, because they are 'very busy', and it is 'the Easter holidays you know'. As compensation, they sent me details of a couple of jobs that had become available - 'Technical Consultant' and 'Routing Analyst'. As I don't have a 'basic familiarity with switches such as Nortel and Softswitches' they weren't really much use. Don't worry, I have no idea what any of those things are either.
I think they should combine the Jobcentre Plus with the Lottery, then I could phone Wales, and they could make me an appointment at the local cornershop to buy a lottery ticket. They could then keep sending me random numbers through the post until I got six that were in the right range to mark down on a lottery ticket. Then I could go to the cornershop for my appointment, buy the ticket, come home, find out I didn't win, then do it all again next week. Joy. Pure Joy. Livin' Joy. I'm a dreamer...

Posted by paul at April 7, 2004 10:13 PM